Women are great at telling men exactly how they muck up their relationships and dating. Some time they let loose on the way men wear shabby clothes or take me out to crap places before (not cheap places, just crappy ones- a takeaway on a beach is good, Mc Donalds at the restaurant…well NO) 

But little is written about how women stuff it up. But they do. They really do! If you keep on getting alot of almost, or first dates and little seconds, you have to look in the mirror and start asking yourself why.

After dating alot myself and talking to hundreds of men about what's happening to them,  I learnt us women are very interested in finding out a man’s status “what is it that you do?” and his focus and his passion…

But men want to know we are fun, uncomplicated, passionate (but not in the same sense as us- we want to know they have direction, they want to know we are happy and sensual) and most importantly someone that makes them feel good. Quite often we want to speak our mind, and even in jest make little put downs- but if you make a man feel good, (and yes it is pampering the ego but so is that “oh you look lovely” when he first sees you”) then you’re sorted!

Showing you value him, his ideas and his thoughts is going to get that second date happening alot more.

As a little aside- I’ve long felt it’s our job as women to decide how far it goes. I know I’d go on a date and realise that the person wasn’t for me, and I could see my behaviour shift- by the end of the evening, the guy just wouldn’t want to call me, not because I was not friendly but because I was giving out the uninterested vibe. If I was interested they’d respond in kind. Us girls have far more power than we think we do in leading things to the next level- and we need to know that and own that. if you aren’t getting those second dates, it is really, quite possibly, actually, entirely, YOUR FAULT.

By Rachel